Love is not to be cultivated. Love cannot be divided into divine and physical; it is only love -not that you love many or the one. That again is an absurd question to ask:”Do you love all?” You know, a flower that has perfume is not concerned who comes to smell it, or who turns his back upon it. So is love. Love is not a memory. Love is not a thing of the mind or the intellect. But it comes into being naturally as compassion, when this whole problem of existence as fear, greed, envy, despair and hope has been understood and resolved. An ambitious man cannot love. A man who is attached to his family has no love. Nor has jealousy anything to do with love. When you say, “I love my wife,” you really do not mean it, because the next moment you are jealous of her. Love implies great freedom -not to do what you like. But love comes only when the mind is very quiet, disinterested, not self-centered. These are not ideals. If you have no love, do what you will go after all the gods on earth, do all the social activities, try to reform the poor, the politics, write books, write poems -you are a dead human being. And without love your problems will increase, multiply endlessly. And with love, do what you will, there is no risk; there is no conflict. Then love is the essence of virtue. And a mind that is not in a state of love is not a religious mind at all. And it is only the religious mind that is freed from problems, and that knows the beauty of love and truth.
Jiddu Krishnamurti, The Book of Life